To make the most of this tool, it’s important to be honest with yourself and others (see Tool 2.7: Radical Honesty).

This tool is about flipping the switch on your mode of communication—instead of defaulting to not sharing information, and only doing so when there is a compelling reason, you can acquire the habit of sharing freely, and only hitting the brakes when it becomes necessary. Transparency is not a binary setting, of either not sharing anything with anyone, or sharing everything with everyone. Rather, you can take a gradual path to opening up, and experiment until you find a level that works for you.

As you open up and default to sharing, make sure your sharing choices match your overall preferences and well-being. Despite this new inclination to share, there may be situations in which you don’t want to share an intimate truth. Just remember, saying, “I don’t want to talk about it” is a valid reply.

Opening up sometimes comes with a price. Some people won’t welcome your free and uninvited sharing, or simply won’t know how to respond. They may be accustomed to superficial chatter, and  lack the capacity for deeper conversations. When this happens, it’s good feedback. You might end up losing some relationships, but discovering closer and more meaningful ones in their stead.